Elf Ears Are Not a Statement of Religious Belief: On Paganism and Normality

I declare now before you all: I am Normal. Yes indeedy. It’s the straight and narrow path for me, normal job, respectable appearance, fairly common political views, no psychotic episodes that I can remember. Society (and in fact, most Pagans) look at me and take me for somebody who has probably never done anything remotely weird in her life. Society thinks this because I don’t go out of my way to declare via my clothing, hair colour, number of piercings, or choice of footwear, that I am in any way different to Average Joe. The Pagan community thinks this because I don’t conform to the usual image of a young female Pagan: my hair is resolutely not dyed black, I’m not Goth, I don’t wear enough pewter necklaces to start my own jewellery stall, nor do I own a pair of New Rocks, fairy wings, or pseudo-medieval clothing. Hell, I don’t even wear a pentagram around my neck anymore – especially if I’m attending a big Pagan event.

Now, don’t get me wrong – I used to dress and act like this in the past. I even enjoyed it. And as such I’m sure many of the people around me were certain I was Pagan, and I’m sure many people in the street were scared of me. But I’ve been put off this appearance. Put off by one simple sentence spouted by so many so-called “Pagans” who I have yet to see actually walk their talk: “But we’re Pagans! We’re not normal!”

Well, I don’t know about you, dear reader, but I’m not Pagan because I want to be “different” or because I want to be not-normal or not-Christian or not-society. I’m Pagan for so many other reasons that variously come under the headings of theology, ethics, mysticism, philosophy, service, and community. In fact, I’d go so far as to say that being Pagan is – for me – the norm, and therefore the most normal thing in the world. It is an inextricable part of my life, my being, my speech, my movements, my thoughts. It weaves itself into my normal life, instead of viciously separating me from it and establishing me as external to this society.

What has struck me most about the war cry, “We’re Pagans. We’re not normal!” is that it seems to be over-compensation for some serious failings on the part of the speaker. Perhaps – and I’m only speculating here with my mean little mind – dressing like a bat out of hell/dragon/elven sorceress/Lord of the Rings extra is a substitute and compensation for dedication, Pagan practice, service to the Gods, and knowledge. Maybe we can measure this: the number of pewter necklaces worn/elf ears owned/un-normality declared is directly disproportionate to the level of knowledge and understanding.

Now, don’t get me wrong – I like elf ears. I own a pair. But I don’t do what I’ve seen others do so often and wear them in the street, or to the big Pagan convention you’re attending (because Gods forbid the people there don’t realise just how Pagan you really are). Elf ears are for FANCY DRESS and are not a statement of religious belief. Actually, I like that sentence so much that I’m going to repeat it in big bold letters:

ELF EARS ARE NOT A STATEMENT OF RELIGIOUS BELIEF.

Getting down to the nitty-gritty here folks: what is it about being Pagan that makes you not normal? What makes you desire to declare your difference in religious belief to the world via means that have nothing to do with said belief? Do you see other members of minority religions revelling in not being normal? I don’t. Okay, so they may have different practices, and such differences may manifest in different rules of conduct in society, e.g. an Orthodox Jew not cutting the hair above his ears, or a Muslim woman covering her hair in public. But these people are all still 100% normal. And you can guarantee that they’re not sitting there proudly declaring to all their friends just how not-normal they are.

So why is it that in Paganism we equate “weird” with “cool” and “more Pagan”? Is it that in a religious community that lacks leadership we set about trying to prove our worth and gain the respect and fealty of others through appearance and “weird” actions rather than wisdom, experience, and knowledge?

Well, this is my challenge to all those who consider their strength as a Pagan to be your “weirdness”: do you really walk your talk? Do you truly believe what you say you do? Do you stand before your Gods honestly and with respect? Do you even know them? When was the last time you did something Pagan outside of your Pagan social group? If these questions cause discomfort, then perhaps you have been using the “I’m not normal” card as a means of staying in favour with the community, and this has overshadowed the importance of real devotion to the Pagan path you have professed.

Do the work. Walk your talk. I don’t give a damn about how normal or how weird you are, just so long as you WALK YOUR TALK. And don’t wear elf ears.